This is the only time I'll be this self-indulgent, I promise.
Q: So, like I said: Who the hell are you, anyway?
A: Thanks for asking. I'm Michael, a 24-year-old writer and editor who lives in New York City.
Q: Oh, cool. What comics do you write/edit?
A: As of yet, none. I edit for a startup magazine, Citizen Culture, and I write mostly prose fiction and this blog.
Q: Uh-huh. So you haven't done anything comics related?
A: Well, I have produced several scripts, including the portfolio I built as part of Danny Fingeroth's Comics Writing course at NYU's School of Continuing and Professional Education.
Q: That's… really not very impressive.
A: That's really not very much a question.
Q: Fuck you, Mr. Defensive.
A: Right back at you, douchebag.
Q: Are we mortal blog enemies now?
A: Since you're a rhetorical construct created by me for the purpose of this FAQ, I hope not. That would be more confusing than the time Wonder Man came back from the dead.
Q: Which one?
A: Good point. Any more questions?
Q: Yes. Since you're not much of a professional authority on comics, why should I listen to you?
A: Well, I could be a wiseass and point out that it's not stopping anyone else from blogging, but instead: I've been reading comics, and reading about comics, for nearly twenty years now. In that time, I've developed not only a great deal of thoughts about them, but some of those thoughts are intelligent and original. And I can express them well enough in writing that I feel compelled to share them. Besides, no one's demanding that you agree with me…
Q: Wow, you really aren't a typical comic blogger.
A: Thank you. As I was saying, you don't have to agree with me, just give my viewpoints a fair shake before rejecting them out of hand because none of them is that [insert creator who's not as good or avant-garde as everyone thinks they are] is Christ reincarnated.
Q: Please. We all know that Peter David is Christ.
A: Damn right.
Q: So, what was your first comic?
A: Either ALF #2 or Mickey and Donald #3.
A: I know.
Q: What, were they sold out of Jerry Lewis back issues?
A: Oh, shut up. I was six.
Q: How much do you think those early Dave Manaks go for on eBay?
A: I can turn this computer off right now, you know.
Q: I'll be good.
A: Good. Any other questions?
Q: What do you love/hate most about comics?
A: Other fans.
Q: Makes sense. Can I ask you questions about old comics/new comics/your darkest sexual fantasies?
A: Sure thing. Use the comments below (I'm working on switching to a spam-free comments paradigm soon) or email me at [address no longer active]. Women are encouraged to include pics.
Q: You're a sad little man, you know that?
A: Yes. Yes I do.
Q: So, how many tubgirl pics do you figure you'll get?
A: At least one, from Stonegold.
Q: That boy ain't right.
A: No kidding.
Q: So what's Fingeroth really like?
A: Nice guy. Clean nails, nice smell, a class act all the way. Likes the Diet Pepsi.
Q: I never woulda guessed that.
A: The man's an enigma wrapped in a mystery.